hey dude, you're never going to see this, which sorta makes it easier to say...
I love you, so, so much, I can't put it into words. Sitting here typing this, what, two weeks after school got out? one? however long, ...it already hurts. Talking to you isn't enough.. I'm so used to seeing you every day, and it's so much harder to make you laugh every day, because if I make someone laugh they can't think I'm a failure, right? Without you it makes me feel like I'm a failure, because I am failing at not making you laugh. It's what lights up my day and I can only stand without it for a couple of days, weekends, and suddenly I have to go two months... it seems impossible. I'm not sure I can take it. But I'll hang on. for you.